If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Randomize
