i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
