Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
