No stitches, just platelets and will power
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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