But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I love you.
Bad choice
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