And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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