Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
