i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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