Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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