why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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