I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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