MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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