it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Don't EVER smell your tampon
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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