My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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