is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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