Just fell off a train. Bad.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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