Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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