Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
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