Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
