i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
