Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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