did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I am one with the molecules
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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