they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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