i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
did i just pee glitter
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
