They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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