This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
