oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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