erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
