i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
this boner is exhausting
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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