real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
