So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
