yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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