PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
