that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
