Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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