So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
