This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
