she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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