i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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