he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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