It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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