It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Randomize
