Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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