you would pick up someone in the library
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
