He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
