how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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