Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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