Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
