Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
