Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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