Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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