i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
