I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
